I believe it’s important as a wife and mother to wear makeup and dress nicely for your husband and family. We are all busy, and I understand that. However, it’s important for your marriage and to your husband.
For most of us our husbands work out in the world, amid dolled up women, with their hair all fancied up, nails colored and filed, dressed in their mini-skirts or revealing clothing. This is a fact of life. Even if they don’t work arm to arm with women like this they are at least exposed to them during their commute through billboards or just women walking around.
It’s a tough world we live in.
There is sex attraction everywhere. And, unfortunately for them, most of the visual distractions are geared towards men, being highly visual creatures.
Because we are wired differently this can be hard for a wife to grasp. Why should I go through the inconvenience of dressing up? My husband loves me for who I am, right? After all, he married me!
What were you like when you met?
This is true, ladies. However, it is a good idea to remind our husband’s who it is that they married. When you were dating/courting how did you present yourself to him? Were you wearing sweatpants all the time with your hair pulled back, un-showered, wearing flip-flops? Were you dressed frumpy or attractively? The majority of the time, how did you present yourself to him?
I know for me at least I always had perfume on and tried to dress quite attractively. After all, I really liked this guy! He was such a gentleman towards me, was a hard worker, and was quite genuine (not to mention he was quite good looking!). I wanted him and so I wanted him to want me! I was constantly trying to attract him. <3
It doesn’t take much!
Now, I don’t mean you need to spend an hour every morning curling your hair, putting on your makeup, and answering the door when he comes home in high heels! It honestly doesn’t take much. Your husband just wants to see you trying to look nice for him. This can literally take 5 minutes a day. Make this part of your morning routine now!
Get dressed!
You already have to get dressed in the morning. When you do, choose something more presentable to company than your pj’s. The most important person in your life is deserving of the same courtesy as company, isn’t he?
Do your hair!
You already have to brush your hair. Instead of just throwing your hair into an automatic messy bun try alternating your hairstyles each day. One day you can put it in a nice bun, another day wear it down, another day put it in a ponytail, etc. Just spruce it up and spend an extra 5 minutes. That’s all.
Put on a little makeup!
Regarding your makeup, it takes me 5 minutes to do my makeup in the morning. I wear powder, eyeliner, eye shadow, and mascara; almost everyday. When I don’t it’s usually because I know we are going to go swimming or I’m not feeling too well.
If you’re new to makeup you can always ask someone for help. There are Mary Kay women out there that would love to showcase their products. There are also department stores that would like to doll you up. However, just remember to keep it simple. Don’t fall for all their multiple layers.
If you don’t keep it simple you won’t keep up the routine. It’s just that simple! Stick to powder and a little bit of makeup for your eyes. Your eyes are the most important as this feature is the most expressive of your face.
Some women like putting on lipstick as well. I only wear a lightly colored gloss when we are going somewhere; Mass, business appointment with my husband, etc. I just don’t see it as important, but that’s me!
And don’t forget the earrings if you have pierced ears, and maybe a necklace. They can be simple, nothing too extravagant. They just help complete your look.
This isn’t much extra work ladies.
Please don’t underestimate how important this is for your marriage. Just try it if you don’t already do this! If he doesn’t immediately notice he will after just a few days. Husbands don’t always notice the details but they do notice the overall.
This is an ugly world we live in. Our husbands are always being preyed upon by the media and outside world. We may have won them over when we married them but it is our job to keep winning them over. Taking this little extra step is something that is so important in today’s visual world.
Try it and then tell me if your husband noticed! I’d love to hear your experiences. God bless you!
This was soooo fabulous. Thank you very much. I just started wearing “nicer” clothes, but didn’t feel right wasting time on hair and makeup. But you’re right- I see it as an investment now.
I’m so glad Sandra! Our husband’s are a wonderful investment. 😉
Unfortunately I do all of this and it’s still not enough for my husband. I’m kind of at a loss I don’t know what to do. I don’t feel comfortable changing myself a lot just for sex when I already take 20 minutes to do my face and hair and I always dress nice. He wants me to wear clothing I’m not comfortable in and it’s becoming a problem.
I’m sorry you’re having problems! Marriage has both its joys and its sorrows. 🙁 I don’t advocate wearing clothing publicly you’re uncomfortable in. If it’s in private that’s another story. 😉 Could you talk with your pastor/priest? Get his opinion? And, better yet, maybe your husband would be willing to talk with him as well. Sometimes getting an outsiders opinion can be a huge help to a relationship. <3
I also want to say that wives need to dress up for themselves!
Sometimes I take my kids for a play date and the other mother is wearing sweats or something, (which is fine, just Using it as an example) and she tells me how hard it is for her to feel organized and calm and clean and how much she is struggling with motherhood in general.
Well, it starts with yourself. If you feel frumpy and grumpy, your house and kids will too.
We all have those days though! 😉
I completely agree! When you dress up (clean clothes, showered, hair, makeup if you wear it, etc.) you feel like a new person. It is so important to take care of yourself.
Aside from showering regularly I didn’t dress up when we met. I’ve always been on the heavier side. Jeans. Tee shirts. Flannels or hoodies. Post baby it’s gone to stretchy leggings.
Lol
I’m a very plain (unattractive face) woman who just looks stupid in makeup. It makes no difference to my face at all. The only thing I do really is keep clean and try to keep my weight down. I don’t look fat as I’m nearly 6′ tall. Just gangly and awkward. My hair is very thin and straight, so I don’t really do anything with it. It don’t come easy to us ugly gals (in fact, it don’t come at all).
Every woman has their attributes! I’ve never seen one that didn’t have something they could ‘dress up’. Us women are just too hard on ourselves, including you. 😉
Keeping clean and your weight down is a great place to start! Husbands love when they see their wives trying to be attractive. For example, I’m currently working to get my weight down and get back into shape. Being 46 I’m noticing that it’s sooooo much harder to lose anything!! But, when I go on the treadmill or lift weights I can see this little glimmer in my husband’s eyes that make all the work worth it. Even if I lose nothing he appreciates the effort I’m making to be attractive to him.
My hair is also thin and straight. And now, thanks to Covid, I have about a third of what I started with. I don’t mean to seem salesy but look at my Lilla Rose website (www.lillarose.biz/raisingalargefamily). I’ve been wearing a Flexi Flip in a small almost every day for the past two months. I can’t leave my hair down because it’s too thin so I do an updo with my flip. It’s feminine and easy.
Try not to be so hard on yourself. That just sounds like the you (or the world) beating yourself down. You are beautiful. Stop telling yourself otherwise. <3
Speaking as a man, the most salient thing in this article is to remember, “It doesn’t take much!” I really believe wives over-think this and over-worry. They think, “I’m too fat. I’m not pretty enough. It’s too much work. He won’t notice”
Hah! Men are visual creatures. And no matter how much you think his roving eye looks at billboards or other women, he would MUCH RATHER have his OWN WIFE just put in some effort to dress feminine for him. You don’t have to be a model. You don’t have to be skinny, have perfect boobs, or anything. Just get rid of the sweats, the frump clothes, the stuff that screams, “Don’t care how I look!”
Neaten up the hair, put on a little makeup (don’t waste more than 5 minutes on this), and a dress (if he likes dresses, or a skirt (if he likes skirts), or a tank top (if he likes tank tops).. get the idea? Almost anything besides dressing like a 12 year old boy or looking like you just came from the bowling alley will get his attention.
Generally speaking I think this is solid relationship advice (along with still doing things like flirting and dating each other as part of the marriage). Is there a Scriptural basis for your recommendation, or is this just guidance from experience?
I’m glad you like it. I’d say this is advice coming from experience, primarily, and a ton of reading, secondarily. Plus, just common sense. I would like my husband to take care of himself and look like he cares about what I think so I imagine he’d like the same! Wouldn’t you agree?